Funny Instagram Captions

1000+ funny Instagram captions. Download and share them with your friends & followers.

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.
If each day is a gift, I’d like to know where I can return Mondays.
My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday.
All you need is love, or a dog.
I wish everything was as easy as getting fat.
I have so much to do that I’m going to bed.
Surely not EVERYBODY was Kung Fu fighting.
The ‘earth’ without ‘art’ is just ‘eh.’
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Champagne is always a good idea.
The last time I was someone’s type, I was donating blood.
Coffee before talkie.
I need a six month vacation, twice a year.